A Father’s Day Journey

FYI…this might take awhile.

When I was just about nine, and Shen was almost 11, we moved from Herndon to Haymarket.  We moved from a street with about twenty kids to a gravel road with no kids.  Actually, there were two girls that lived down the gravel road, but try as we may (or not) to be friends, it just wasn’t going to happen.  So, we had to find ways to keep ourselves busy.  Mine came in the form of this Honda Spree.  Shen and I had been saving our money for ages, and I remember the day my parents took us to the Manassas Honda shop, and we bought these scooters.  We each had one.  Shen rode hers, but I have to say, I crushed her in miles ridden.  The odometer says over 3,000 miles.  That’s more miles than riding from Los Angeles to Washington D.C.  We weren’t allowed to ride the scooters on the road, so I rode up and down the gravel driveways and through our grass fields.  I had a whole imaginary world I travelled in as I rode around all day.  At a recent visit to my parents’ house, we went down to the barn, and I saw the scooter.  It brought back lots of memories – a lot of journeys. 

To say that we’ve been on a journey the past six months would be an understatement.  It’s been a roller coaster of ups and downs, excitement and trials.  Most who read this blog know that Mark finished the 2010 year with DC United then embarked on a journey to transition to coaching in college soccer.  While the transition would seem to be a fairly easy one, it’s been a tremendously challenging road.  While we would have thought that years of experience at a high level would be an attractive thing to prospective coaches and athletic directors, apparently it is not.  If I went into the details of all of that, I’d be typing for hours and now is not the time for that.  Maybe down the road, when things become clear, we’ll be able to articulate better what all this has looked like.  At times it’s been frustrating and consuming, and at other times, we just focus on the day at hand, enjoy life for what it is right now, and trust that the Lord has a plan.

So, you might be wondering, where’s the Father’s Day connection?  These thoughts just really filled my head today as I thought about what today is all about.  For a friend so near and dear to my heart, today signifies a journey has ended.  She was there with her dad as he battled in the last weeks and days of his life, and their journey came to an end just a couple months ago.  Today is her first Father’s Day without her dad.  For another dear friend, he’s celebrating his first Father’s Day.  After years of a journey though the process to adopt, he finally has his boys.  He’s a dad for the first time this Father’s Day.  

For me, the journey we’ve been on the past six months has given me a deeper appreciation for the burden of a father.  I’ve seen my husband stand strong in the face of (what I think is) unfair opposition, and I’ve seen him struggle under the challenge to pursue a passion and still provide for his family.  Our girls have gone from being used to dropping daddy off at the airport on a regular basis to asking multiple times where daddy has gone even if he’s just gone for a few hours.  The journey has meant the day to day of trying to stay patient with the process, patient with the kids, patient with ambition, and patient on the Lord.  Some days the road is easy riding, some days the road seems full of potholes.  It’s a journey.  I’ve seen my own dad come along side my husband in a way that has meant the world to me.  Through regular weekly coffee talks, my husband has been listened to, prayed for,and encouraged in a way that only a caring father with a lot more life experience could provide.  The job of being a father doesn’t end when the kids grow up. 

Lastly, I’ve been on a journey with my heavenly father.   I’ve asked a lot of questions.  I’ve had trouble getting on board with potential opportunities, and I’ve battled in my mind to try to understand where this past six months is taking us.  I’ve asked for Him to be more gentle on our confidence level.  I’ve asked for him to help us understand where we need to go.  I’ve asked for a lot of patience and a lot of peace…those requests sometimes come on the hour.  Even though things haven’t all worked themselves out yet, and even though I wish God and I could think more alike on one opportunity in particular, I know that He loves me, He cares for me, and He’ll give us what we need.  It’s a bonus that He controls the whole universe, so these things won’t be a problem for Him.  Like the correction of a father, it doesn’t mean that things are going to work out the way I want, and it doesn’t mean that I’m necessarily going to be happy with the outcome (at least in the short term), but it does come with the guarantee that it all will be worked out for good – His good.  On another day and in another time, when this journey has come to some form of a destination, I will be sure to share what that is.  But for right now, today is about the journey, and I’m glad I’ve got some good fathers in my life to do the journey with.